Monday, October 25, 2010


When did things change and feelings become uneasy? How does life become so idyllic and move to possible deception so quickly. We met in an usual manner, this I know, however it all seemed so meshed in our thoughts and mannerisms. We became so close and trusting over time. I was so careful for I had been warned so much about Internet dating. Yes I said, "Internet Dating" .. the world of lies, scams, spyware and malaware. Gotta love it right, well I do understand all your worries, but I am good at being careful and choosing carefully. I will never let anything stupid like that happen to me, no matter what all say. I am smart and careful at all times. Eric is good and honest man and we have been talking for over one year, writing, emailing, sending packages and phone calls. He is a good Christian man with children. Hard working and supporting his family as well as his Mom. I am fine ...

Thursday, October 21, 2010

These moments

How could I allow my past experiences to cripple this love from this terribly wonderful handsome man, I have been given such a gracious chance to meet? I am at this moment drinking wine (my fav) and listening to Andrea Bocelli from this absolutely amazing tenor,I hope you are willing to open up your mind along with your heart and broaden the chance to learn to enjoy new things that I love so much in this world God has blessed us with, at this moment I feel as a little girl riding the carousel of life and as I pass I see you standing near by with your hand out as I move by on the Merry-Go-Round I look back at you, you are smiling this wonderful handsome strong smile,as if to say to me, "Solaire grab my hand, grab my hand!" as the carousel goes around. I lean over as I approach you, and you grab my hand and jump aboard and hold me. At that very moment my life was sealed, sealed with you my love, my lover, my friend and well only you know the rest?

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

The Letter

In the presence of beautiful moving music in my (our) bedroom I have reread your truly wonderful heart felt magnificent love letter to me, written in the quiet of the wee hours of the morning on the borrowed laptop your friend brought to you to use to write to me. How wonderfully beautiful it was as I read it once again without questionable or confused feelings of distrust. Actually, I reread "our" whole conversation on Yahoo and I was able to see and feel as we, as a couple stumbled through all the bad feelings and what brought us through it all, of course "our" love for one another. For the first time Eric my Prince I feel so much love and peace when I think of you and my heart is also thinking of your children and wanting so desperately to earn their trust and love as only a "step-in" not a replacement for their beloved Mother, although my heart will always be open for such acceptance if they ever wish it so.