Tuesday, September 28, 2010
HOW DO I DEFINE LOVE?
I was recently asked by a friend of mine, "How do you define love?" Well, having just recently lost someone who was extrememly important in my life, that is a hard question to answer in an exact form ... For me love is defined in many different ways, for there are all kinds of love ... I feel it is an emotion that changes with each person we meet ... The depths and circumstances of each meeting is never the same ... The heart experiences a variety of emotions created by each unique individual that comes into our lives ... However, true chemistry love is fleeting and we only have it rarely in our lives ... So, if you ever experience it; do not lose it!! And if you have been lucky enough to find it twice, well it is a "gift" and be smart enough to see this fact ... Grab onto it as if it is the "Brass Ring" in life ... We can each just be so lucky, then we will recieve mediocre love ... out of life!! The heart and soul of each of us are very emotional, yet intellectual components, and once we learn to read our feelings more precisely our lives will be more enhanced ... Throw away the box that life and society put us in; and follow your instincts ... listen to your heart and soul and not the voices of others in life ... dance to your own tune (song), live your predestined life and experience the gifts from the universe and God ... You see I feel that when we meet another and we experience that amazing "connection" together, it is like an "addiction" something worth fighting for ... I also believe that life and God only give us so many chances to get it right ... As for me I do not want to wake up one morning and remember all the things I could of had or enjoyed and remember the feelings and life I could of lived, if I had not listened to the wrong messages from life or others I trusted to share with ... We all have a tendency to try to make everything clear and acceptable, but in reality all we are doing is trying to make it fit in the box that others will find acceptable ... For me life has to have passion, and a special chemistry and the other person is able to make me feel that passion, that "addiction" to one another always from anywhere, such as; a phone call, a text, a letter, a song, words said to me, in a voice .... You see it is an "undefined" emotion inside of me, that only that perfect connection can create in my heart and soul ... I will never surrender to less for me ... I am an individual with special needs created for my own being ... So my response to my friend is, "Love for me is undefined, it has many definitions" but the most unique for me is the "connection" that was God's gift to me; and whomever shares it with me as well ...
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I believe there are many types of love. The love we have for our children and the love of a spouse. Losing either can wreak havoc on our lives. My wife and I just lost our 19 year old daughter in November. Nothing could have ever prepared us for that. Even today there are moments of anger and deep grief. You never recover from that loss; you merely go on. Too many questions remain unanswered.
ReplyDeleteIt's so odd I read many (not all of your posts) and I feel like I am reading someone in my life. You see I was a divorced father of two kids. I have custody as their mother was an addict (I say was because she passed away about one year ago). Anyway I met a woman through interent dating and we spoek for a long time before we finally met and the rest was quick and wonderful. The trouble is those around me (kids, mother family) did not welcome her so easily. We have had a tough time. To be fair the continued problems are many times on her shoulders as she bares a grduge to those who made our start difficult. And perhaps the toughest one for me to overcome at thsi point and not walk away from her is my children. They gave her a tough time. They were young. They ahd 1000% of me and now needed to share and their mother was never really a mother with constant hopes and disappointments of being one. But they grew and matured. She, however, after 3.5 years still holds every bit of it against them and can't let the past be the past and hope for a new and better future. I doubt she realizes it at this point, but I have allowed tons of changes and things to be done on her behalf (my kids live with my mom because after 2 years together the stress was unbelievable for everyone - I probably should have left her then). But now that my kids have tried so hard and I see no effort on her part I think I am finally ready to walk away in spite of my love for her. Ready, but still not strong enough.
ReplyDeleteI doubt you have read this far, but if you did I am grateful and I pray for a great and wonderful miracle for your son, because in spite of all my kids' trials and tribulations they are healthy and growing part emotionally all the time.